10/23/08 15:43:10 - Headlines

I’ve tried to keep this blog apolitical, and I think for the most part I’ve done a good job. (That’s part of the reason I haven’t written anything most of this year: I don’t want to bore/annoy any of my five readers with my political opinions.) I just saw a headline, though, and felt the need to post it:

Actual AP Headline: McCain says Obama will 'say anything' to win

My first reaction was, “That’s a hilarious statement coming from any politician.” The whole idea that one side is telling the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth while the other does nothing but spew lies and venom is absolutely incredible. (If you don’t believe me, check out www.factcheck.org, then tell me which side isn’t at least exaggerating a bit lot.) It actually brought an old saying to mind. It’s not, however, the one about people living in glass houses throwing stones. The more I thought about it, the funnier it seemed, especially in the context of this year’s election. So, I submit Headlines I want to see:

Pot calls Kettle "black"

Outraged Kettle supporters demand apology for playing the "soot card"

Pot adds "er... wait, that's not what I meant! By 'black' I really mean 'evil!'"

Pot retracts statement again

Kettle: Pot "out of touch out of touch with American kitchen implements"

Pot running mate accuses press of dwelling on "verbiage", adding "Real America" knows that a Pot is better for stewing moose, anyway

Kettle: “You can put lipstick on a ladle…”

Pot campaign claims umbrage: “Just because she’s skinny and pretty doesn’t mean she’s only good for serving soup”

Got more headline ideas? Post them here!

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Velda wrote:
Nice :) I'll have to look back on this someday soon when politics aren't such a terribly frustrating topic (given that I can't stand any of the candidates)
23/10 16:39:40

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